


Room for Sweaters

by taelynhawker



Category: Schitt’s Creek
Genre: Boys In Love, Coda, Comfort, Episode: s5 e3 the plant, Insecure David, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-24
Updated: 2019-01-24
Packaged: 2019-10-15 14:28:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17530439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taelynhawker/pseuds/taelynhawker
Summary: David feels stupid he ever thought Patrick would want to live with him. No one else had.





	Room for Sweaters

David excuses himself once Ray and Patrick start talking paperwork. He knew if he’d tried to leave before that Patrick would have stopped him and he just doesn’t have it in him to reassure Patrick that he’s fine. 

He’s decidedly not fine. 

He feels monumentally stupid. Beyond stupid. Stupid is not a strong enough word. Moronic. Delusional. Pathetic. And definitely embarrassed. And he hates feeling this way. But how else is he supposed to feel when he’d been completely foolish enough to think someone would want to live with him? That Patrick would want to live with him. He puts his fingers to his temples, pacing the hallway, and then decides a single door is not enough space between himself and Patrick right now. 

He goes downstairs. To be honest he contemplates going back to the motel but then he’ll have to face Alexis and he’s not ready for that. He and his sister have a... mostly... loving habit of teasing each other fairly relentlessly but he’s not even a little prepared to be teased about this. 

About feeling so secure in a relationship for once that he hadn’t even considered Patrick didn’t mean... didn’t want... 

He opens the door into the bright light of the day with a frustrated noise that is somewhere between a sigh and a whine and which terrifies a man walking past. He makes a contorted attempt at a smile that only seems to make it worse if the man’s hurried footsteps are any indication. 

How long does he have to calm himself down? Should he leave? He could leave. They’ll be a while, knowing Ray, and he can just text Patrick and say something came up at the motel without actually going to the motel. And that, that seems like the best option. He grabs his phone, sends the text, and then turns his phone off. 

Not silent. 

Off. 

He just... that same desperate sound leaves him followed by furious mumbling at himself. It occurs to him that Patrick might come down looking for him so he takes off. He has no idea where the fuck he’s going to go but it can’t be here. He can’t be here. 

Stupid. What a fucking idiot he was. Of course, of course, of course... why the fuck would Patrick want to live him? They spend all day together. Almost every day. Who the fuck would want also want to spend every single night with him too? Share a space? No one ever had before, hadn't Alexis just pointed out as much? Literally no one. Thinking about all of this he really doesn’t know why he’d so easily convinced himself Patrick meant the two of them. Of course he wanted a place for himself. David understood. Sometimes even David didn’t want to live with David.

He got it. 

So why didn’t it hurt less? Why did... why did something like shame refuse to stop burning through him? 

He doesn’t know where he’s going until he looks up and realizes he’s at the store. It’s closed today which means it’s the last place Patrick or his family will look for him and that’s perfect. Exactly what he needs. He needs to just not be found for a while. Just a little while. To get his head together. That’s all. He pulls out his keys and unlocks the door, locking it behind him before going over to turn off the alarm. 

He doesn’t turn on any lights, instead he pulls a chair out and sits just beside the register. He lets his head fall back and stares up at the ceiling. His eyes fall on and skitter away from, the two frames on the wall. He doesn’t want to look at them right now. He closes his eyes and forces himself to take in a few deep breathes, letting them out as slowly as he can. He does it again and again. 

It doesn’t help. His face feels flush, his fingers tingle. Is he having a heart attack? Or a panic attack? Impossible to tell. He stands, the chair scraping against the wood. He paces the floor. Back and forth until he finally grabs a rag and starts meticulously dusting everything. Every shelf, every item. Losing himself in the boring rhythm. It helps. Even if every now and then he has to stop and push the palms of his hands into his eyes and bite down on his lip. 

Hours pass, actual hours. Until his back hurts and his fingertips are slightly shriveled from cleaner. He doesn’t feel the hours, in fact he’s surprised to realize how late it is. He sits on the floor, contents of the last shelf he’d been working on spread around him. He hadn’t meant to disappear for hours. Fuck. 

He’s about to get up, he’s about to turn on his phone, when he hears keys in the lock and the door open. 

“David?” Patrick’s voice is high and thick with worry. 

He contemplates just hiding there until Patrick leaves but the alarm is off so... 

“David!?”

“I’m here,” he says, unfolding himself with a groan. “I’m right here.”

“David,” Patrick’s voice is breathless, his whole body seems to slump with relief. “Where did you go? I tried to text you back, I went to the motel, they hadn’t seen you- are you okay?”

He crosses the store to David, almost trips over the products on the floor, and grabs David’s shirt, pulling him in. It’s almost habit really, to let himself be pulled in. He presses his cheek to Patrick’s shoulder and closes his eyes. How can the person who caused all this panic also offer all this comfort?

No. It wasn’t Patrick who had caused this. David did this. David assuming things instead of... instead of using what he knows. Like the fact that no one has ever wanted to live with him. God, no one has even been able to put up with him for this long.

“What happened to you?” Patrick asks, not letting him go. “David, you had me worried. You just left? Your phone was off?”

He’s about the lie again, blame his family, but didn’t Patrick just say he’d been there. 

“I was going to go to the motel,” he starts, as Patrick pulls away only enough to look at him, not letting him go. “But then I was thinking about how it’s been a while since I dusted. So I just stopped by to clean a little bit.”

“You came in on your day off to clean?” Patrick asked. “You sent me a text, turned off your phone, and you came here to clean.”

“Yes,” David said, only halfway faking his offended tone. “I came to clean.”

He tries to pull away, not wanting to talk about any of this. He really still doesn’t want to talk at all. He’s done enough talking today, hasn’t he? God, he’s shoved his entire fucking foot in his mouth today! He’s done. He can’t do anymore. 

“David,” Patrick’s voice is soft now, he lets go of David finally and David starts bending and picking up the products he’d left on the ground. “Look can we just- will you just talk to me.”

“There’s nothing we need to talk about,” David says, shooting a look at Patrick and having to look away almost immediately. 

“I think we do. David, what happened in- in- in the apartment. We, uh, we should talk about that.”

“We did,” David says. “Some day, when we’re ready.”

“You were ready.”

David’s face scrunches up like he smells something awful and he shakes his head almost violently before waving a handful of product at Patrick. He’s not. He wasn’t. He was being ridiculous. That’s all. 

“David,” Patrick’s voice is firmer this time and David huffs.

He straightens up, still holding an armful of plastic bottles like a shield between them. Patrick’s face is soft and sad and it reminds David of when Rachel showed up and he doesn’t want to think about that either. He doesn’t want to fucking talk about this. His eyes burn and he looks out the window instead of at Patrick. His cheeks are flushed hotly. For once he actually wishes he wasn’t in a sweater. 

“I shouldn’t have said we,” Patrick started. David bit his lip to stop himself from interrupting. “I never thought you would want to live together. You’re usually more... cautious about big steps. You know, family barbecues and saying I love you. You kind of tend to freak out on me. So I just didn’t think you’d want to find a place... with me.”

“It was just a misunderstanding. It’s fine.” He sighs. “I was being stupid, I don’t know why I assumed you meant us... I don’t know I thought you wanted to live with me.” 

“I do.” Very soft, very quiet in the silence of their shared business. “I just thought it would be good for me to do this first. With- with Rachel we did everything together and nothing felt right and I don’t want those mistakes, with us, I don’t want us to make mistakes.”

“And living with me would be a mistake.” Voice flat, David starts to put the last of the products away. 

“Now, doing it now might be.”

David huffs, nods, swallows around the lump of emotion in his throat. He desperately wants this conversation to stop. 

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing one of us isn’t a complete moron,” he mutter. 

“Please stop saying that, that you’re stupid. Or a moron. You aren’t any of those things David. I love you.”

The last of the products are put away and David has nothing else to busy himself with. He leans against the shelf, arms crossed protectively over his chest. 

“David, I love you. I plan on loving you for a very long time.”

Warm hands grasp at his waist and David lets himself be pulled in closer. His hands fall to Patrick’s shoulder but don’t do more than rest there. He’s still not good at hearing this. Maybe that’s why it hurts so much that he’d thought Patrick wanted to live with him. 

“I want to live with you. I want to keep running this store with you. I want you. And I love that you wanted to move in together. And I’m sorry that I’m making you feel this way. I don’t ever want to be someone who makes you feel like this.”

There’s a hand on his jaw and he lets his head be turned. Patrick’s eyes are wet, large and dark. He looks upset. He looks desperate, like getting David to understand is the only thing that matters. David’s hands tighten on his shoulders. 

“I love you so much, David.”

“Well... I love you too, so.” He blinks too fast, looks away again. The words still aren’t easy for him. “So did you sign the papers?”

“Not yet,” Patrick admits. “I got worried about you. I’m going to sign them tomorrow. I was hoping you would be there. I’m not doing this without you. It’s not like that. I’m doing this so we have time and space alone. Actually alone. Not with your family or Ray on the other side of the door. And not while we’re losing money keeping the store closed for extra long lunches.”

David huffs a laugh, but that tension won’t leave his body. Patrick rubs a hand up and and down David’s back. He pulls him closer, so that they’re pressed completely together. David curls his fingers around the back of his neck. 

“David, I don’t know how to make this better. Would you rather I not get it?”

“What?” David’s tone was sharp and confused. “No, god no, get the apartment. It’s a good space for you.” And it was, it was a good space for him. 

“Listen, even if we aren’t moving in together now, this is still for us. You’ll be there all the time, right? We’ll make sure there’s space for your sweaters.”

“In the closet,” David clarifies.

“In the closet, yes. I wouldn’t dare tell you to put them in a drawer. But you can have a drawer too.”

“Mmm, well that sounds reasonable.”

Patrick nodded, leaned in and pressed his lips to David’s. David sighed into it, let himself lean into Patrick, his arms going around his neck. He kissed Patrick again. This was better than talking. His thumb rubbed Patrick’s jaw and he kissed him deeper. 

When they pull away Patrick still looked worried. 

“One day, David. I promise you. We’ll pick out the perfect place, you and me.”

David nodded. His chest felt lighter, softer. He was still embarrassed by his assumption, but... less than he had been earlier. 

“You should sign the papers today,” David murmurs. 

“Only if you’ll spend the night with me.”

“Oh, yes, yes I’ll be there with you.”

“Even if it’s just blankets and pillows on the floor.”

“For you, and only for you, I would sleep on pillows and blankets on the floor,” David says, smiling against his lips. 

Patrick pulls David with him, heading towards the door. One day, David thinks. One day. And in the mean time... he’ll have room for his sweaters.


End file.
